***** [Nashville] [formal banquet hall] [James Dobson and John Piper share the stage; a who’s who of Christian culture is gathered in the audience] JAMES DOBSON: [at the podium] Hello and welcome. I will be your [squints at notes] ROAST-MASTER for tonight. And…I suppose it will fun…and light-hearted…and various other things. [one person claps in
***** In 1995, when I was 14, my family moved to Missouri. My siblings and I were homeschooled, and the first few months in our new surroundings were rough because we didn’t know anyone. We had heard that public school kids sometimes went to underground parties called “raves,” and that sounded fun, and you know
Five years ago, I completed a writing project that still affects me. About this time every year, when football season starts up, the memories come flooding back. In 2011, before I had this site, before I was on Twitter, before Homeschool Sex Machine, I decided to write about high school football. I didn’t want a
***** Two Baptists, doing what Baptists do, arguing over whether or not drums should be included in the worship service. Yet, just below the surface, a different kind of tension. Sexy tension. Simmering chemistry. It is a potluck of sensuality and both of them have brought the same dish: DESIRE. And both dishes are steaming hot.
Bapturtle (the Baptist Pokemon) Frequently found in buffets. Can be lured with fried chicken. Primary attack is the Perseverance of the Saints. Vulnerable to the Schism. Doesn’t “evolve” into anything, thank you very much, what kind of church do you think this is? Praise Bro-kachu Typically found at Christian colleges, but known to frequent youth
***** [Pasadena, California] [campus of Fuller Theological Seminary] [auditorium full of seminary students] [Baptist DJ in corner plays theme music, motions for crowd to cheer] STEVE HARVEY: Hello hello and WELCOME TO THA SHOW. I’m Steve Harvey and this is America’s Next Top Preacher, and we’re about to put the ILL back in homiletics! [crowd of students roars]
(thanks to my Twitter friends for helping with this) (thanks to Jenn at Sweet T Makes Three in particular) ***** A Think Piece Response to the Open Letter to My Unborn Child About the Things Wives Wish Their Husbands Knew to Pray For: a Manifesto You guys, I’m not trying to start a debate. I just need